There is a certain allergy to imperfection there is a certain allergy to imperfection. However, the reality is that we all have weaknesses that we can improve, although this should always be done from a realistic and compassionate perspective with ourselves. Knowing where we are weak does not make us vulnerable. On the contrary, it strengthens us, since self-knowledge is a first step to improve ourselves and grow day after day.
A world of weaknesses: perfection does not exist.
Although it is necessary to praise the qualities we have, it is also necessary to know how to be self-critical.. The natural tendency when we sell ourselves to others, whether in informal relationships or in work settings, is always to offer a polished image of ourselves. However, this profile can be unnatural. On the other hand, being transparent with our strengths and weaknesses gives us great value as people, since honesty and sincerity are essential to improve or perfect those points that cost us the most.
Avoiding reviewing our weaknesses can prevent us from having a realistic view of who we are and encourage a misaligned ego, so that receiving criticism will be experienced as an attack and not as a learning opportunity. Although, as we say, nobody is perfect, sometimes it is necessary to adopt some changes in the way we behave, since many times our defects can cause problems with ourselves and with others. Trying to change these more problematic aspects will allow us to be more satisfied and, ultimately, happy.
Of course, many of our shortcomings and weaknesses are the result of multiple variables, of course, many of our defects and weaknesses are the result of multiple variables as our personality style, our education, our family context and other experiences we may have had. Each individual has his or her own cocktail of experiences and that is why no two people are alike and not all of us have the same difficulties to work through. The good news is that weaknesses can, on many occasions, be improved.
In this article we are going to compile those weaknesses that people can show, indicating what each one consists of so that you yourself can do this work of self-analysis in order to know yourself better and improve.
What are our main weaknesses?
As we have already mentioned, no one is exempt from defects, since absolute perfection does not exist. Knowing the weaknesses we each have is a first step to improve as people, so let’s review the most frequent ones.
Selfishness implies that the person attends to his or her own benefit over the needs and desires of others.. It is a weakness that is noticeable in all areas of the individual’s life. The selfish person refuses to offer help to others when they need it, acts driven by his or her own good regardless of how this affects others and does not engage in actions aimed at the common good.
Selfish people are often unaware that they have this defect. Therefore, the role of the environment is important in the early stages. Close people should let the person know, in an assertive way, that his or her attitude is not appropriate, as it is harmful to others.
2. Lack of empathy
Empathy is one of the most appreciated virtues, so its absence is conceived as an important defect. When a person is not empathetic, he or she is incapable of perceiving reality from the other person’s point of view. Therefore, he/she cannot imagine how the other person might feel, nor does he/she consider acting to make him/her feel understood. This lack has a powerful effect on interpersonal relationships, as it can hinder the establishment of healthy and intimate bonds.
Insecure people lack sufficient self-confidence, so they feel helpless in the face of challenges and events that are thrown at them. They feel helpless in the face of challenges and events. Insecurity is closely linked to difficulty making decisions and standing up for one’s rights in front of others. Feeling insecure may lead the person to act according to what others want or expect of him/her, adopting a submissive disposition instead of acting in a firm and decisive manner.
In addition, insecurity will also be problematic in interpersonal relationships. People with this defect tend to get involved in dependent relationships and are willing to act according to their partner’s wishes, often tolerating unacceptable behaviors in order not to be alone. Insecurity is a defect that is usually detected by paying attention to small signs, especially those of a non-verbal nature. Insecurity may cause the person to speak with a low tone of voice, without gesticulating too much or maintaining eye contact with his or her interlocutor.
Dependence is, in a way, linked to insecurity. Dependent people have enormous difficulties in managing on their own without the support of others.. This has serious repercussions on their daily lives and greatly limits their possibilities for personal growth. Among the most characteristic problems of dependent persons are difficulties in making decisions, managing one’s own life, carrying out tasks independently, etc.
Throughout our lives, we all need to acquire increasing independence in a progressive manner, so that we assume responsibilities according to our age and maturity. Dependency is a serious problem when it occurs in adults who should be able to take care of themselves.
Envy has a certain relation with insecurity and dissatisfaction with oneself. Envious people crave to have what others have.Whether it is a material good, a job, a relationship, etc., envy is manifested when the individual who feels it chooses to attack the person he or she envies. Envy manifests itself when the individual who feels it chooses to attack the person he envies. This feeling, as we say, hides great problems of dissatisfaction.
In case of experiencing it, it is necessary to reflect on what is wrong in our life and what we would like to change. Disqualifying others is only a strategy that masks the real problem, so it is essential to address the situation if we begin to experience this feeling so toxic to ourselves and others.
Proud people are those who live with the firm belief that they are superior to everyone else.. This thought is especially problematic, since the person acts in an overbearing and even humiliating way with others. In addition, pride acts as a shield that prevents the individual from recognizing his or her own mistakes and, therefore, from improving. Pride is also an obstacle to collaborating with others, empathizing with them, accepting other opinions and points of view, etc.
Hypocrisy is a fairly frequent defect. Hypocritical people act contrary to the values they promulgate and, at the same time, act in line with principles they openly criticize. The person conceals his or her true thoughts and intentions under a mask, something that can lead to major problems in his or her life. Hypocritical behavior is often related to social desirability. That is, with what others expect of oneself. For this reason, in the face of hypocrisy it is essential to reflect on what are the authentic values that guide one’s own life regardless of the judgment of others.
Irresponsibility is another great defect. Irresponsible people are not capable of committing themselves firmly to activities, projects or commitments.. Likewise, they do not fulfill their obligations and do not respect the rules. They also do not assume the consequences that this way of acting may entail.
Irresponsibility generates problems for both the individual and his or her environment. The burden of their irresponsible actions often falls on family members or co-workers, which can have serious effects on the social, family and work environment.
Disorder leads the person to inadequately manage their material and immaterial resources. This causes the individual to keep his personal space in a chaotic state. Similarly, there is also an inadequate management of time and pending tasks to be done. For this reason, it is common for disorderly people to have trouble accomplishing all their tasks, maintaining a well-organized routine, arriving on time to the right places, etc.
People with this tendency act without taking into account the perspective and opinion of others.. Although it is important to have our own criteria and act according to our values, it is also necessary to consult with others about the steps we are going to take. This is especially important when our behavior will have repercussions on others. In the workplace, it is common for people who are not capable of working as a team to act in an individualistic manner, without taking into account the point of view of their colleagues.
In this article we have reviewed the most frequent defects and their characteristics. Defects are part of human nature, although sometimes they can seriously interfere in our lives and affect the people around us. In these cases, it is convenient to make an exercise of self-analysis to detect which are our weak points and to value in what way we can improve them.
It is not about finding perfection, because it does not exist. On the contrary, the goal is to find a balance that allows us to be ourselves while at the same time feeling satisfied with the way we do things, avoiding unnecessary harm to others.