Fearing growth is more common than you think and we don’t just mean growing up as adults and having all the responsibilities that come with that, but growing as a person.
Stagnation can often be a constant fear of failure, which is why we try as much as possible to avoid success and even more so to face the obstacles that come our way, because instead of seeing them as a reason to improve, it is a way to reinforce our weaknesses.
Bringing as a consequence a deep insecurity that can go unnoticed through staying in what we know as ‘comfort zone’ which may reduce anxiety and worries, but will prevent us from moving forward and emerging. Leaving us in the same place every time and with which we always find excuses that are disguised as justifications about the limitations we have to improve.
Has it happened to you? That you feel stuck in the same place and you feel that no matter how much you want you can’t find that leap towards your growth, then this article is for you. We are going to know what are the most common limiting beliefs in people that prevent their success or inhibit their progress.
What are limiting beliefs?
They are determined as an altered perception of reality and the opportunities that arise, which are evaluated as a threat to integrity due to the feeling that one’s own abilities are not sufficient to overcome them successfully. This not only impedes favorable personal growth in any area of development, but also significantly affects confidence and self-esteem.
The big problem with these beliefs is that if they are not dealt with in the right way to eliminate them from the mind, the person will end up normalizing them and making them part of his or her individual belief system.
Most common limiting beliefs in people
Clarifying the origin and what these beliefs are, know below which of these are the most common and tend to become a mantra that anchors us to inaction or mediocrity.
1. This is who I am
This is the most classic excuse to avoid giving explanations for inappropriate behavior or not trying something new, although it is very important to have your own convictions and vision of the world, it is never advisable to close yourself to change.. This prevents you from seeing opportunities that are beneficial to you and you will have communication problems.
People who have this limiting belief resist change because they think that change means being someone completely different from who they are or that it will bring something negative to their lives, when it doesn’t necessarily have to be the case. Change can be the ideal impetus to hone your skills and grow.
2. The environment must change
This belief only highlights your inability to recognize and assume responsibilityas well as a poor justification of a consequence caused by a mistake made. It is true that not every environment is right for us, but we must keep in mind the ability to be able to adapt to the environment, to have the confidence to interact and stand out harmoniously with everyone, instead of demanding that everything adapts to you.
3. I can’t do it
‘Why can’t you’ ‘Just because I know I can’t’ is very common to hear this from some person who doesn’t have solid self-confidence and is afraid to take risks so that they don’t have to face the consequences, even if those will help them improve in the future.
The problem is. how can you know you can’t do it if you don’t try? Trying something new is not a mandatory indication that you have to dedicate yourself to it. If you don’t like it or it didn’t work for you, then don’t do it again, but always keep the learning it leaves you with.
4. It is better to repress emotions
‘Crying in front of others makes you look weak’…. But then, you can’t let off steam even at home? People with this belief tend to keep their emotions and feelings to themselves, for fear of being judged by others, rejected or humiliated in any way, which poses a great threat.
However, these people tend to become unempathetic, cynical, withdrawn, diantantic or have difficulty relating to people.
5. I don’t have the opportunities
Another very common excuse to avoid doing something or trying something new, after all, if you think you don’t have the ideal opportunities and the perfect timing, why bother doing it? Yes, for sure it will be impossible to achieve it. However, it is sometimes necessary to find our own opportunities, it is sometimes necessary to find our own opportunities instead of waiting for them to magically fall from the sky. It is necessary to keep in mind that ‘the perfect time’ does not exist, if you want to do something, find out what you need to do and do it now.
6. Life is very unfair
We don’t have the right conditions because life is very hard, but we have news for you, life is as you perceive it. In this sense, if you believe that you are an executioner, then you will see everywhere a punishment cell and in that way you will not be able to emerge even if you think you are trying, because you yourself are putting the biggest obstacle of all.
7. I have no time left
Many people have the firm belief that if they don’t achieve or conquer a certain goal by a certain age, then they have no chance of ever achieving it. Who said this was so? There is no time limit for you to start doing what you have always wanted to do, you just need the motivation to want to achieve it.
After all, you’ve heard the famous saying ‘it’s never too late to start’.
8. I will always stay where I am
This is what we talked about previously about staying in the comfort zone, which may seem like the most convenient environment to perform in, considering the skills you think you have. Then this will prevent you from having the possibility to grow, even in what you are good at, just because of the fear of thinking you can’t do it.
Do you think you can go from being good to being excellent?
9. Relationships are more difficult now
Although, there are more challenges nowadays to have an intimate relationship with someone, because there are those who prefer to have a casual relationship or seek a different path than yours, the secret to overcome this is communication and that is exactly the failure in this case. People who always make excuses for not improving the quality of their relationship, for not being encouraged to date or for believing that no one person is suitable (and vice versa) are usually because they have problems communicating as well as resolving conflicts.
10. I need a partner to be happy
A big mistake! To be happy in a relationship and make someone else happy it is first necessary to be able to be happy on our own, since our own happiness depends only on us and no one else. If you go into a relationship with this fixed belief, then you are likely to be more unhappy than anything else, because you will always have a distorted idea of happiness.
11. Why fix myself up if no one will notice me?
Why do you have to look good to please someone? It is true that we may want to dress up to get a positive response from a person, but this is not always the case, as self-care is only a reflection of feeling good about ourselves. This is only a pretext to justify a failure, when it is due to poor interaction, opening up to a person and low self-esteem.
12. I don’t know if I’m ready
Think for a moment, are we ever really ready? The answer is no. We are never completely ready to face something, because experience comes through practice and if you don’t start doing it, you can’t get a favorable result or learn how to achieve it.
13. This can wait
Because people don’t feel ready, they put that desire in the ‘I’ll do it later’ or ‘there will be time for this’ box, we know there is no rush to achieve some goal. But procrastination can become a tendency to procrastinate, for fear of some kind of failure or failure.
14. I don’t know what my purpose in life is
Very few people know their life purpose at an early age and follow a plan with respect to it, but not doing so is completely common and there is nothing wrong with it, since your purpose is only yours and no one else’s, so it is up to you to work on discovering it and getting to it.
But how to discover it? First you must change the belief from ignoring your purpose to searching for your purpose, then start practicing different things until you find something you are passionate about and finally, study everything you need to perfect yourself in it.
15. I better keep it to myself
People with major insecurity problems may feel that their opinion or point of view on a subject is not worth sharing, because it is not good or interesting enough to be known by others, so it is better to keep it under lock and key. This leads to people not being able to know the real extent of their potential and they will become increasingly withdrawn.
16. Surely they are better than me
One of the reasons why people are also silent about sharing their opinions, as well as preferring to stand back rather than make their presence known, is because they have the mistaken but secure belief that others around them can do much better than they can. This can have repercussions of submissiveness, manipulation or feelings of inferiority.
17. I am somewhat useless
Thoughts of personal belittling is also a very usual limiting belief and affects people who have this perception of themselves, as they think they always ruin everything. This belief acts as a double-edged sword, on the one hand to stay in the comfort zone, as it is the only place where you can ‘do some good’ and as a justification to avoid working on your problems.
18. I am not worth that much
Feeling that we do not deserve something is the same as feeling useless to achieve something, since we perceive ourselves as a worthless person and therefore, we deserve everything bad that happens around us or even worse, we generate the actions to make everything in our life look negative for ourselves.
19. I am not a pessimist, I am a realist.
Another clear example of limiting beliefs are pessimistic thoughts, after all, how is it possible to be encouraged to experience something if you believe that everything will go wrong? So they prefer to go in with a defeated attitude so that failure is expected. When this thinking is very common, it becomes a part of everyday life.
20. Others are to blame for what happens to me.
Although some people claim that everything bad that happens around them is because of them or their low value, these people believe that the actions of those around them are the cause of their failure. Either because they hold him back, because they are unfair, or because they believe they are envious of him, when this is completely false.
21. If only it were otherwise
If I had more money’ ‘if I had studied such and such’ ‘if I had not made that decision’ ‘if I had a better opportunity’. The past only helps us in one way: by teaching us, all the consequences of our actions leave us a learning experience to improve, but they are never an excuse to hold us back or prevent us from continuing to seek our path.
22. Success is impossible without the right circumstances
Again, the perfect moment does not exist, it is a fallacy to justify the fear of facing something unknown, so it is preferable to delay until the ideal opportunity arrives. But when is that ideal opportunity? Many success stories come from the uphill struggle of those who made it, rather than being a gift. So what are you waiting for?
23. It’s no use giving it all away
Why make an effort if nothing is going to get better? The only way to grow is to work at it, strengthen our skills and keep our spirits high. In this way it is possible to face obstacles successfully, but if we restrict ourselves and have a negative attitude we will not obtain a favorable result, then the road will not seem worthwhile.
Do you often have any beliefs that are limiting you?